Where did it all go wrong.

Well I have found out something very important about my life. What did I find out? That my life sucks big time. I also noticed that in my life I have had either one thing or another to take the place of a real life. I have either been a workaholic or in a relationship and they have taken the place of having a real life on my own. I have put either the job or the girlfriend in front of everything and they have replaced whatever was the missing part. I didn’t realize this until the last couple of days. At the moment I don’t really have either of those options to fall back on and it’s really hurting me. Both mentally and physically, I mean hell I am sick most of the time. I am drinking more than I have in a while. Hell depression can just wreak havoc on a person. It’s funny I can fake it really well while I am out with my friends but the moment I am alone again it’s like I am stuck in a bottomless pit. Now at this point all I can do is look back on my life and think of all the mistakes I have made. Hell I know now that some of the mistakes were of my own choosing but damn. Like they say hindsight is 20/20. I know I should have fought when I just gave up. At this point it’s all I can do to keep going. Well now that I have gotten that off my chest I should feel better but damn I don’t. oh well time to figure something else out.